Ah, Valentine’s Day. It is that one day a year people pretend to be in love with each other because we have been programmed to since we were young. Couples will go out on dates, school boys or girls will be sending cringe worthy letters to one another. Valentine’s is pure cringe-gasm.
I am 23 years old, and the only thing that ever happened to me on this god awfully mediocre average day is that in the Ninth grade I received a card from an eighth grade girl. I ended up tearing the letter thinking it was another cruel prank by my bullies… it was awkward and I felt awfully disgusted myself when I found out the truth. High school fucking sucks. The rest of my Valentine’s was spent by myself, where I usually mope around wondering why I was single. Weirdly, this is the first Valentine’s day where I possibly won’t be giving a single fuck about my status.
It has sadly taken me 23 years to finally realize that I don’t need to be in some form of troublesome relationship to be happy with life. I think society and pop culture brain washes us from a young age to believe that relationships are these things we require in life if we want to be happy and successful; even though that isn’t the truth.
My sisters, colleagues, mother and other people in my life are constantly questioning me if I am in a relationship and why I am not in one. It is annoying. I keep telling them that I just prefer to be single. I have been single for the majority of my life and I have survived. I have no want, nor no need to be in a relationship. I don’t have to worry about keeping someone else happy especially when I am struggling to be happy myself. I am not financially well off enough for a relationship and I simply just want to enjoy the limited free time I have to myself.
Apart from not wanting to be in a relationship I am just not dating material. I am just an average looking guy that has crippling social anxiety and is completely awkward in social settings. I am introverted and I simply just suck at holding conversations. I practically have no self confidence and I pretty much hate my own existence. These are things women tend not to seek in a guy. These are things I need to fix if I ever magically ever hope to land up in relationship.
I just see no benefit to a relationship; except maybe the fact that it would allow me to watch movies, television shows with someone. Also, the occasional back scratch would be nice.
So the point of my pointless rambling is to just state I look forward to spending Valentine’s alone jamming to my new favourite party track